in a whirlwind

There is no way I am going to recall the last three-four weeks for you day by day but maybe you can get a feel for what's going...

I started classes yesterday and am still getting the feel for this semester. So far classes seem like they are going to SWAMP me, but some of it will be enjoyable. I think I just need a better outlook on this semester...I haven't started my work hours yet, which is absolutely murderous. I get paid pretty much shit and I need money. I'm worried I won't have enough for March, and March is very important to me. I'm on the lookout for a second job so help a girl out...

So why is March very important to me? Spring Break. And no, I'm not going to be a slut in Cancun or be lazy in Florida, I'm going to be freezing my ass off in Minnesota. Why? Because that's where my man is! and that's where I want to be. I guess that's also something new I haven't talked about, but it's time you get used to it because he's going to be around for a very long time...in fact, he's probably going to outlast this blog, because I don't think I'll be blogging forever. I know what you're thinking, long distance relationship, I know. It's not easy, believe me. I hate waking up and going to sleep; I never feel so alone. It's taken me a long time to come to terms with my feelings and a lot of the time I never let him knew how I have felt for a LONG ass time because I feared the distance, I feared something that was good for me, and feared actually feeling loved and loving someone...I just hope all the time I left out my emotions doesn't lessen anything I tell him now because all of a sudden it seems I am infatuated with him...and I am. There should not be one person on this planet who doubts an ounce of the love I have for this man. I love you. You are my future.

Ok, sorry about that *shakes off the emotional face*, but I wanted to give you a little insight to my moods and emotions during these past few weeks. Even though I will say, I had a wonderful time in Berlin and will review the city and people another time, all that was stated in the previous paragraph largely affected my trip as well, being I just had to say "See ya later" a few days before (I never say goodbye for fear it will be the last time...).

Get over my sappy ass, I'm human too.

I'm immersing myself in culture this semester and specifically getting a LARGE jumpstart on my Cinema Studies Minor by taking a 700 level (typically the most advanced in undergrad here at UNH) World Cinema course, and doing a 700 level Independent Study in Russian Film (which is also credited to my Russian Minor). I'm a busy woman, no doubt.

Things I'm looking forward to/excited about and you will probably hear about: Spring Break, NEW Alkaline Trio CD February 23rd, UNH v Merrimack on Saturday, MAN UTD being top of the Premier League, and trying to be Healthy.

Until next time my darlings,
Be grateful for what you have and try not to fuck it up.
Love,
Napalm

Sunday: I Feel Ambiguity

No blockquote! Surprise!

I know, that's a first, isn't it? Today finally feels like summer which makes me extremely happy. I'm ignoring all the outside pressures and anxieties I have for a while (even though they are picking at me somewhere in the back of my mind) and not worry about anything until at least Wednesday night. Why? Because Tuesday I will be at the House of Blues on Lansdowne St. in Boston enjoying myself as Rancid sings all my troubles away. The headliners are Rise Against, who are being supported by Rancid (which makes NO fucking sense to me, I think RA should kiss the soles of Tim Armstrong's converse) and Billy Talent but I got tickets just because Rancid is playing. Honestly, I couldn't even remember the names of any Billy Talent songs.

Enough of that, I returned to the movie theatre this weekend after many beach-at-night exploits as my weekends usually consist of. My friend and I decided to see The Ugly Truth with Gerard Butler. Now let me say this before you groan and roll your eyes at me, I already knew how the story was going to play out just by watching the previews/trailers. So I wasn't expecting a life changing plot and ending, not at all [but Gerry is a wicked actor!]. On the other hand, it was pretty funny- after I yelled at some loud mouth asshole behind us to shut his fuckin' mug. Movies are great- too bad they couldn't come up with a device that weeds out the assholes and puts them all in the same theatre with each other. Assholes, theatre 6. Let everyone in theatre 11 enjoy their movie. All the mothers with babies, theatre 14. See how much they enjoy being in a room with 50 others just like them and what that will do to the next time they decide to go see a movie.

I don't have much for you this Sunday, I didn't accomplish much over the weekend, other than having a good time. AND, I think that's what it's all about. Too many people let the stupid shit get them down. I have clothes on my back, a roof over my head, and food in the fridge. Singing to myself, life is good. Fuck the world.

I love you all.
Live it up.
-Napalm